Friday, December 21, 2012

Stop It.

Stop.   Stand still.          Just watch.

Where did the last year go?  The fog has not lifted from my eyes, for the last two years have been a blur of children running in front of me (and under me, and around me, and over me... you get the point).  And now it is December.  Micah and I have had an incredible busy year with these three children and a business that runs steadily forward and, thankfully, doesn't seem to slow down.  And now it is December. 

I say this because every year it feels like Christmas just sneaks up and appears at my doorstep.  I remember waiting and waiting and waiting for it to come as a kid.  Sitting at the top of the steps Christmas morning just waiting for Mom and Dad to get out of bed so we could finally go downstairs.  The tree, the lights, the anticipation.  Now I am in charge of that anticipation for my children.  I am the one bundling up and sending them out into the snow.  How did that happen so fast? 

Stop.  Stand still.  They are growing.  Where have the last 5 years gone?  Where did the last 31 years go?  This year I am more nostalgic than usual.  Thinking more and more about how quickly our time is spent here.  There are moments I mess up as a mom, as a wife, as a friend.  There are more moments when life is victorious and we are living day to day mundane moments that our kids will remember the most.  I pray I can focus on the more moments and keep them special and hold them close to my heart.  This is real life, those diapers you're changing are important.  And those conversations about how tall mountains are, and if they are bigger than the biggest house in the world, are important.  How you answer those questions is important.  I hope I can stop, look my children in the eye and really listen.  Really answer their questions. 

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